Back to Square One?

[Wendylon]

Thank you very much, SS, Regretful, Tumbling, MKB, ForeverYoung and Arsène for dropping by. You've all given me a boost to continue on this path and to accept that H and I go about our lives very differently.

I'm letting go of 'pointing stuff out to him' more and more. Generally, I'm asking him fewer questions. I think I need to start on WOA now. I know that's his LL.

Recent 180s:

-Haven't mentioned that H needs a haircut (he still hasn't done anything about it)

-Didn't mention that H needed to shave after many days of being unshaven (he did eventually).

-Haven't commented on the fact that he's put a wet facecloth on the radiator despite me asking him many times not to as the radiator is rusty and facecloths get stained (I figure that the cost of a facecloth isn't such a big deal and anyway a bit of rust stain isn't the end of the world).

-I'm still making a point of not interrupting him by calling him or by going into his study for things that can wait.

-Haven't made any negative comments about his latest obsession--an IT-related thing that he's trying to figure out. I feel like asking him who he thinks he is that he could figure out how to do something that professional programmers can't do. Since I've known him, he's had loads of 'crazy' ideas that take up lots of his time. I figure it really shouldn't matter to me though whether he's listening to classical music or trying to sort out some IT thing. I can just let him be.

-I handed him a letter that said "Important Notice" in red on it. I didn't query it.

-I passed on a message to say that he was to phone someone. Again, I didn't query it or ask for further details.

We're both in the house quite companionably but no PA at all. At lease, we've not had any arguments/blow-ups in a while and he seems to be hanging around the house more. Yesterday, he had 2 glasses of wine with our supper out but didn't do his normal thing of going out first.

Actually, he's just come up to ask me a question! That's virtually unheard of. He does seem to be quite keen to know what time I'm getting back from things generally and it does make me a bit suspicious. I've usually been the one to ask him when he's getting back but I've stopped. I'm going to a friend's house for supper tonight and he's asked me twice what time I'm back. I finally asked why he needed to know and he said something about scheduling a Skype session--I'm not sure if it's one he's paying for or being paid for. Maybe I should't have asked.

I hope you're right, ForeverYoung, about being in for some nice surprises if I keep this up!