One of my goals is to stop setting myself up for heartache. How am I doing that? One way is to stop doing things that I hope will please or impress my STBXW. I am just going to do what I feel is best, and if she notices, great. If not, oh well. We have two kids together, so going completely dark is not an option. However, I will not be texting her small talk or hints at what I would like anymore.
BD: 8/20/2012 W Files: 8/23/2012 S: 8/25/2012 (I moved out) D Final: 3/5/2013
Grateful I get that Goal. I shoudl try the same. But I am getting some responce back from her. I am just doing the next correct things or i mean try to..
Yeah that is my fear. But is it better to go back to NC if I did that already and got told she wanted a D with out saying it.
If she is reseptive and replied to texts then is that not a baby step. I dont know, But i do worry or well think about how does she take the texting. Like am i pushing her or is she replying just cause she has to but angre that i text her.
But yet she does tell me or did tell me we would talk soon and also in the email said she wanted to be friends.
I was reading the text last night and i guess I can take this one as a baby step too. what do you thing
This was when I saw her at the store with that Girl renting movies, Then walking into the local bar.
my text:It was good to see you. You Looked Very good
her reply text: You too, stay safe
I am hoping she ment I looked good too. And that is diffrent.
I really don't want to bring you down, but I think you're reading too much into this. It just sounds like a polite response, nothing more. It wasn't a compliment or her reaching out at all. That seems to be confirmed by your next comment:
[quote]I'm just that most replies are 1 or 2 words.
In other words, polite responses. She's just being polite. If you start texting more then she'll probably quit responding because she'll realize you're getting the wrong idea.
Quote:
Here is a question for you. i have been texting her almost every day the past few days. so should i wait a day or two.. How often is good to text her.
I would just quit texting her. If she texts you then reply, but don't initiate.
Darn, screwed up the quotes, should read like this:
Originally Posted By: lostforever
I was reading the text last night and i guess I can take this one as a baby step too. what do you thing
This was when I saw her at the store with that Girl renting movies, Then walking into the local bar.
my text:It was good to see you. You Looked Very good
her reply text: You too, stay safe
I am hoping she ment I looked good too. And that is diffrent.
I really don't want to bring you down, but I think you're reading too much into this. It just sounds like a polite response, nothing more. It wasn't a compliment or her reaching out at all. That seems to be confirmed by your next comment:
Quote:
I'm just that most replies are 1 or 2 words.
In other words, polite responses. She's just being polite. If you start texting more then she'll probably quit responding because she'll realize you're getting the wrong idea.
Quote:
Here is a question for you. i have been texting her almost every day the past few days. so should i wait a day or two.. How often is good to text her.
I would just quit texting her. If she texts you then reply, but don't initiate.
OK well for now I have not text her at all. I just dont feel it at this point.
This does not mean that I will not text her. Just that i am not going to do it now.
This WAW of mine is so odd that sometimes the things that work for everyone do not work for her. not sure sometimes how to deal with her as she is so confusing sometimes. says one thing but means something diff. I do what she says and i get yeld at for doing it. This was mostly in the begining of the separation.
Some part of me deap down thinks that she just wants to live life as a single person doing and going where ever she wants. But then again im so f$%^& in the head these days i dont want to rely on what i feel or think i feel. Some how i need to start dealing with facts and just hope in God that im doing what is good for the marage to be saved some how.
Hi All It has been a few days and well i Text my WAW yesterday just to say "Hope you have a good Day" and got nothing back. I have been but this time nothing.
So I broke down I guess you could say and sent this text this morning. Wether it was a good thing or not I just felt it pulling on my heart to do so.
"hows the most beautiful lady in the world doing today? Hope your day is full of all the love and joy God can give you.. xoxx"
Now when i sent it i did not look for a reply but yet i was hoping for something.
It is just hard to keep going on with no contact at all from her. I pray all the time and ask God to guide me and I think the texting is what he was saying i should do. BUt i dont know. I try to love everyone as I would want to be loved. How can a human beeing just ignore someone. This is just beond me.
I was thinking this and tell me if it is something I should or should not do.
I know she works on sat and they can not have the phone with them at all. I was just thinking of calling WAW and just say Hi hope you are ok was hoping to get you to see if you wanted to have lunch or something. I know she will not pick up the phone but it would be a way of me trying to breack the ice on the phone. She keeps saying we will talk but yet nothing ever happens. I try to put myself out there and give her the chance to talk but nothing. She says she wants to be friends but yet nothing. SHe saysi she wants to get a D (without saying that word) but yet she has not made any move to do so.
Jyst so not like the Woman i married. She would always make the move. I think that maybe just maybe she has some guilt in what she has done and may be doing and honestly does not want to realy deal with it. It is like she is just ignoring whatever it is to make her talk or whatever.
Am i crazy Why do I still love this woman so much. I will keep praying as I always do. I will keep reading DR and DB as I am . I will keep trying to GAL and do things for me.
But all this does not stop the pain that the WAW is causing in my life.
