It seems like I have not been on here in weeks....but its only been a few days. Also looking back over this post and thinking about my sitch right now, it feels like its been several months. But again, its been a couple of weeks!!!WTF!! I am still trying to be patient. I think I can say IO have done a very good job at dropping the rope! There have been no R talk, no arguements, lots of talking (still when she wants it), I have been detached and giving her space. Things have still been the norm over the past few weeks as far as what she does around the house, but I have not let it bother me like it used to. I am still frustrated about a lot of things but I am not letting it show. We have been getting along really well.
Sometimes I can tell that she is trying to "distance" herself. An Example of this is when she calls me when I am at work, she will keep her tone and the ways she speaks to me as almost business like. Its weird.
The thing that I am having the hardest time dealing with (ready for the 2x4s) is how I feel like I am being used!!! She still goes out a lot. She says its to this friend's house or that friends house (all female of course). I feel like I am a sucker. I know she texts other guys (whom she may consider friends for all i know) but there of course is never any mention of them. I just can't help but to feel like I am getting played. I KNOW!!! She said that she doesnt want to be married, but I still think the way she is acting is extremely disrespectful to me, and our marriage, regardless of its state.
I have still not really GAL. I have been so busy with work and college, I am just having a hard time finding time. Hopefully things at work calm down here in the next couple of weeks. I can hopefully be able to finish my college during work hours (yes I am very lucky to be able to do that) and refocus time on me. I do have to travel overseas here in the next couple of weeks. Maybe I can use that to re-energize me!
