working very hard at detaching but sometimes it feels as if i am giving up.
djr, i wanted to comment to this since I also struggled with the concept of detaching. The key is not to detach from your wife. The key is to detach from your feelings for her. Don't shut her out, but in a sense you have to stop treating her like your wife, at least as you know her. She is in a fog right now. All you can do is be nice and cordial to her and be the best person you can be. Do as many 180s as you can, for YOU. I am in a similar situation where I feel that the reasons she was unhappy seemed trivial to me. What's important, as eyesopen and my IC pointed out, is that it doesn't matter. whatever she is going through, she believes that they are reason enough to leave. So your only recourse is to work on you and show her that you are still the person she fell In love with and mothered your children. Hope that makes some more sense. I had issue with detaching at first because I didn't understand what that meant.
Me - 32 Wife - 31 No kids Married - 3 Together - 6 "I need space" - July 2012 Bomb/Presence of OM - August 2012 Separation - September 2012
