DB Bootcamp -- Breakdown and Mach1

[mamabird]

Tough stuff Breakdown. To me it sounds like your wife is doing a bit of cake eating. I can see a lot of me in her, in what you say about her behavior. She sounds like she's can be a little selfish, and that she holds the threat of a D over your head to "keep you in line". She can pull that ace out of her sleeve whenever she wants. One reason why I told my H to just go and get a D was so that he couldn't do that to me anymore.

The drinking thing is a little concerning too. This is also something I used to do when I was working. OM2 was a big drinker (problem avoider) so he would always try to get me to go drinking with him, an offer I cautiously accepted a time or two. It was fun, he made me feel good, I felt like I was in college again. In fact, the night that the S hit the fan, I had been drinking and I was actually at my college reunion. So I bet there is a bit of that "pining for lost youth" going on with her. She probably enjoys being the center of attention when she is with those men.

I do not think she will go through with the D. She seems to want to be with you and work things out, though it appears that she's still seeking or yearning or feels incomplete somehow. If you could find a way to get to the bottom of this with her, she might open up to you. She might not be aware of any of this btw.

I'm glad we can be there for each other to help interpret our respective spouse's behavior!!