Yesterday my husband and I decided to take a break. I needed to think about what I want and he was "confused" about how he feels.
Today....
My husband called accusing me of calling his POSOW and hanging up on her. That SHE read MY phone number off her phone to him. I said I don't even know her number. YES YOU DO. YOU HAVE FRIENDS IN COMMON SHE TOLD ME SO. I said so, we have friends in common big deal, I am NOT discussing her with them. SHE SAID YOU DO. Oh, then it MUST be true huh? So then I said why don't you ask to see the log on her phone? He said she "dismissed it" so there's no record. I said really? then how did she read it off to you. That stumped him. Then he said she wrote it down I guess. I then said btw, when you "dismiss" a call, it shows in your missed calls log it doens't get deleted. Stumped him again. Then I called him back to say I now had in my hands the detailed call records from 10/1 thru today at noon. He said so, it takes 3 days to show on a bill, she already told me that you would try that. I said oh really... 3 days she said? Then how come I can see right here that you called my house phone 2 times before calling me here? Stumped him again.
I told him I hoped the two of them psychos were happy together and lived a long and crazy life together but I am bowing out of this madness now.
He said I believed you. I said, no you didnt. And I am SOOOOO glad I had proof she's crazy. I said still think she's worth it? He said don't do that. Whatever.
I doubt he will be back. I just handed him to her. Somehow she will convince him my "logs" are a lie. It's what she does.
I highly doubt even THIS will get him out of the fog.
This will probably cause me to lose my official "DB Honor Badge" (as if I ever had one of those anyway), but I just LOVED all of that.
Nicely done, Ruby. There's a time for highfalutin' DBing and applying the concepts, and then there's the occasional time for landing truth darts. Methinks you just landed a few good ones.
Now . . . leave the "last nuts in the bowl" be. They deserve each other in their current states.
He said he wants to read information about the fog and no contact with ow that I have him weeks ago. For me to leave him alone until he finishes it and he will call me tomorrow. I said you know there's no more choice to make right? He said is that how you feel? I said you didn't ask me you accused me and even called me a liar. And you STILL have no apologized for that. And STILL are confused about whether or not you want a relationship with her after that bold face lie? I said she can have you. He said I will call you, if you pick up then you pick up. I don't expect the call honestly. I don't think he will read it and even if he does SO WHAT. What psycho crazy thing will she do next? Apparently she is desperate enough to have him to lie about me without thinking it through, how do I know she's not dangerous?
WS moves out 9/11 OWH DD#1 12/11 FR#1 1/12 DD#2 2/12 WS leaves 4/12 WS tries FR#2 6/12 WS/OW move in 7/12 WS leaves OW 9/12 WS back with other OW 12/12 Said OW demanding we D 5/14/13 WS files divorce 8/28/13
Ruby - You sound like you could use a vacation. Maybe take a couple days off and go somewhere relaxing? You have my permission to fly to Vegas and sit by a pool, or go to a spa retreat, or catch a flight to London for a couple days of theatre....or whatever floats your boat.
Yes, I know, things cost money - but really, in the scheme of your financial life, is an extra few hundred bucks gonna make a difference?
Do something impulsive, selfish (in a GOOD way) and have some FUN. Leave the nuttiness behind for a few.
That she would go so far as to lie to him to keep him, is it possible she is dangerous? I know that might sound crazy but if she's desperate enough to take the chance he will find out the truth and lie anyway is it possible and should I be worried at all? I've tried finding stories where OWs do this to wives but the funny thing is I find more about wives doing it to OWs. It has to be more common, doesn't it?
WS moves out 9/11 OWH DD#1 12/11 FR#1 1/12 DD#2 2/12 WS leaves 4/12 WS tries FR#2 6/12 WS/OW move in 7/12 WS leaves OW 9/12 WS back with other OW 12/12 Said OW demanding we D 5/14/13 WS files divorce 8/28/13
That she would go so far as to lie to him to keep him, is it possible she is dangerous? I know that might sound crazy but if she's desperate enough to take the chance he will find out the truth and lie anyway is it possible and should I be worried at all? I've tried finding stories where OWs do this to wives but the funny thing is I find more about wives doing it to OWs. It has to be more common, doesn't it?
WS moves out 9/11 OWH DD#1 12/11 FR#1 1/12 DD#2 2/12 WS leaves 4/12 WS tries FR#2 6/12 WS/OW move in 7/12 WS leaves OW 9/12 WS back with other OW 12/12 Said OW demanding we D 5/14/13 WS files divorce 8/28/13
You're obsessing over this, and trying WAY too hard to "teach" your husband. You can't teach a wayward. FAR too many words spoken to him -- just give him a simple "This is YOUR mess; YOU need to clean it up," and let him be.
And taking off somewhere to do something nice for youself = GREAT IDEA. Get yourself into a better, calmer place before you begin more decision-making.
What a nut job. Maybe get a restraining order if your worried?
M: 29, H: 31 D: 9 S: 8 T: 13 Y M: 9 Y ILYBIDKIILWY 12/09/2012 ~~~~ Worrying does not empty tomorrow of its troubles. ~~~ it Emptys today of its strengths
