I think I see the picnic!

[2chiquitos]

Thank you Arsene for stopping by.

Today I had no cell or land line cuz I am behind on the bill. Money problems. So H n I didn't talk all day which is odd because we talk a few times throughout the day. I got really confident and when he came home I said, "I'm a little shy about this but I wanted to tell you, I missed you today since we didn't talk all day." He agreed and I gave him a hug.

I had no expectations when I did this so I wasn't disappointed when he agreed. nice.

I guess he got confident too and said, "well since you're cell isn't working, I'll stop by after the gym to see if the kids are asleep." I gave him this look like, uh, yeah right! I didn't say anything then but when he did come over tonite I did express myself.

I said, "if you plan on coming over in the evening then you should plan on staying the night here once or twice a week. And if you plan on staying the night here then you are more secure of your decision as to whether you plan on coming back."

He was a little, mmmh uncomfortable let's say. Then I said, "I've been thinking a lot about our last R talk we had last week. I had said I wasn't certain about you coming back but now I feel confident enough to say that I do want you back home. I want to work on this."

More uncomfortable body language. I said, "we don't have to go into it now, but I wanted you to know how I feel."

H: uh ok.

I do feel confident. If it works out, great! If it doesn't, well it isn't much different than now.

So I must be having a great self esteem day because I feel good about expressing myself and I had no expectations. And I didn't get a response, which is better than a flat out HECK NO LADY!