Paperwork almost done, but not me!

[eyesopen]

I am going to get a hair cut tonight and I noticed my sons hair is pretty shaggy. Son mentioned that my w wanted him to let it grow. I called her to see if that was true and suggested I just have them trim it. Her response was if he wanted it cut then he should get what he wanted. She said something about it is something that he can control. It struck me as kind of odd.

I think a big part of this for her is not feeling like she is in control. How do I show/help her understand that she is in control of herself? I am really at a loss on this.