Thanks for that. I am very hopeful. I almost see this as a chance at a new start for our relationship. I only hope I can get her to see it that way too!
Can I ask how you turned it around? Its very hard to do the best friend thing and not feel any resentment. I am trying every single day though.
We both took our daughter to a medical appointment this morning (nothing serious)and in the discussions with the doctor there were several moments of tenderness between us. I swear for one moment after that she was going to kiss me goodbye, like she had forgotten everything for a split second.
How do you balance doing 180's (when you know you have taken her love for granted) and not looking like you are pursuing her? I am finding this balance difficult.
Having said that, she is calling me and bbm me several times a day. Im hoping this is a good sign for me as well, plus the fact we are still in the same house and bed?
Anyway, I have my first DB phone session at 3pm today. Hoping for a great start / continuation!
I gave her a lot of space and no pursuing. Did my own thing like dinner by myself or with the kids, got a life without her, treated her more like a roommate. In a way I kinda avoided her unless she wanted to talk.
Hardest part was no intimacy and I mean none. No goodnight kiss, hugs, I love you, nothing. After about 3 months it was easy because I had no expectations. She eventually asked if I would go to marriage counseling and we did about 6 sessions. It sucked for the most part but we started communicating.
Not sure of your sitch but my wife was having a EA with a friend of mine. Once that all came out with the counselor we were able to work out our differences. Her main problem was she felt I took her for granted which is funny because I felt the same way!
Once I found out that women are all about the emotional love before anything physical was going to happen it was much easier to have a game plan.
Best books I read were:
1. Sex starved marriage 2. Divorce remedy 3. 5 love languages 4. The married man sex life primer 2011
Get your confidence back, she will notice and wonder if she is making a big mistake. Don't leave you bed or house, if she is so disappointed let her move out, hopefully it won't come to that, it didn't in my sitch. Good luck, it will take awhile so remember its a marathon not a sprint.
Oh and just for a good laugh watch "Honey badger don't give a sh1t" on youtube. That needs to be you, let all the BS roll off your back.
Shaky
M 42 W 41 S 10 D 7 M 15 Years T 20 Years Divorce busted
