I took a few trips for myself recently. Experienced pure unbridled freedom of self just doing my own thing for once. Celebrated my 31st birthday this past September and it was full of joy with family and friends.
I'm seeing someone now. We dated a bit in August into September and its still going really well. I held off on it because I didn't feel ready earlier but sometimes a persistent woman isn't one to be ignored so I decided to give it a shot. Honestly, I'm aware its still early with this new relationship but it is the best decision I've made to date.
I will always love my ex-wife, but I have come to terms that it is no longer about her, or the marriage that was. Its about me, what I want from my life and my needs. And as luck and life would have it...it seems fate, God or whatever it may be has delivered someone who fits into those things.
My son continues to grow and learn and be full of life, love and happiness. I see it every time I'm with him and even got complimented by my ex-MIL and my ex/w's Uncle that they're happy I'm still around for my son. I don't know if I ever gave any indication I wouldn't, but it felt reassuring to know that my efforts are noticed.
My ex-w continues to display her erratic mood patterns. Happy and fine one instance, moody and depressed and sometimes a bit of anger at the others. I offer my support as always but when she tells me no she is fine, I leave it at that.
No more pushing, no more persistence. I tried for a whole year to show that this marriage was worth saving, and the ball is in her court if she wants to fix things or not. I did what I had to, I did the best I could for myself and my son. The ramifications of these actions have yet to show their fruition, but I know I have planted the seeds of becoming a better man for myself and my son.
I will always be there for her as her friend, because I know that is where I failed the first time.
Hopefully in time, we can be friends again and work on a relationship of trust and friendship for the sake of our son.
Hope everyone else is well and good in their lives.
