How should I handle money? Should I completely cut her off? Should I offer to help her? She does not make enough with her new job to survive on her own yet. She is moving in with her parents for now.
Don't cut her off totally, but don't give her everything either. Be fair and firm, but reasonably flexible.
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What type of healthy boundaries should I set? Should I allow her to come home whenever, like for dinner on weeknights? What if she offers to help around house like cook, clean or shopping? Do I say we dont need your help to show her that I am strong? When I really do need help.
It is wise of you to consider this now. Spend some time deciding what works best for YOU and your kids, and then set your boundaries accordingly.
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Basically I want to be strong but not in away that will close the door for future reconciling. I think I should try to be her best friend and help if she asks, but not offer help unless she asks. So not to appear as controlling or pleading. Also I do not want to do something where she will use it against me if we divorce. Trying to cover my butt when I am scared to death of future...
Sounds like a good plan to me.
M: A really long time. Crisis: 5 years. She's still worth it.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl
