If your H is willing to work through this with you, good on him. It takes a big man to own his sh!t. Mine is nowhere near that point, but you have been in this a lot longer than I have.
In the end, yes, you can control you and that's about it. You are getting there, I can feel it. Just knowing that you are angry and wanting to change that is a great start. Start by working on recognizing the very first physical sign that your anger is rising up - a tickle in your throat, a tightness in your chest, feeling hot, whatever. And then practice just STOPPING right there.
Me54, H53 M 23, T 25 S20, S18 BD: April 2024 Moved out: August 2024
Love means not giving up on someone even if they've given up on you.
"Being right is the booby prize of life." - Susan Page