I can relate, I felt like that too quite a few times. Now, I don't even have to question the fact that my H is with the OW and he wants nothing to do with me. I feel bad, but less and less each day, it's still at a level where I feel like I can't handel yet, but I think I will get over this to a level where it doesn't hurt so much anymore. After all, we have to find inner peace for ourselves again. Detach more, and hopefully next time if she does something like this, you don't get affected by the emotions.
It's hard to handle for sure, I don't even know if she is with OM. Knowing must be really hard for you. But no one expects you to be just fine, you're human and it's ok to hurt. You're going the right way though. And that's whats important, for yourself.
It's like you said. It's about finding inner peace for ourselves. Making it better for ourselves in the long run. The feelings we have sometimes are inevitable I guess. It's something we have to go through wether we want to or not. When you're right in the midst of it though, it's hard to remember that. You just want to fight it!
Already I'm starting to feel a bit better about today. But for the first couple of hours I wanted to do all the things I know I shouldn't. I had to remind myself over and over that I would gain nothing, but it was hard to keep my head in the right place because I was sooo hurt. Now I'm glad I did though. The "problem" is still there, but it hasn't escaleted and I will deal with it in time.
Together for 8,5 years. S2 Interest in OM. She left 29.09.12 b/c we couldn't work things out. No signs of OM, not digging. Living in seperate homes, sharing custody.
