Afa, You have forgiveness, compassion and empathy for your wife in spades. If you didn't you'd have checked out a long time ago.
I agree with Tori (again) just let her live her thing, she's got some stuff going on that needs an outlet by the sounds of things. Like we vent here, she vents outloud. Imagine you have a shield of protection around you, the stuff hits it like a clean windscreen and runs off. You're safe in there.
