Lost and confused

[Soul.Searching]

If there is any moderators reading this,... I changed my display name lastnight. It said it had to be approved by a moderator. If anyone who has the authority is reading this, can you please fix this up for me? I kinda found this place by accedent and joined. Probably not the best username for me to have. I'd really like it changed please?

I got the kids bikes all packed in the car today to take them to ride at a local park. S back tire was flat, so we pumped it up at a service station on the way. Got to the park, had lunch, went for a bush walk then went to go and get the bikes out of the car. S back wheel was flat again! Looks like he must have gotten a puncture when he took it to his Dad a few weeks ago! We drove around to about five different shops before we could get a puncture repair kit.
Usually that would be something H would do! Looks like its up to me to attempt to fix it for S. I'm sure I can do it.

At the park after the bush walk, I was on the seasaw with the kids and then they went off to play on the slippery dip. It got me thinking about D saying how whenever H takes them anywhere, he just sits on his iPhone the whole time.
Thinking back now, he has already missed out on sooo much! Is still missing out on so much.

A few weeks ago before I deactivated my Facebook I was looking at photos he posted of the kids. Yes it was good to see them but I also remember thinking "They are nice photos but they are not MY memories. They are H's memories and the kids memories but not mine.

Looking over photos a few days later (and boy did I take a lot of photos. I realized that sooo many of them from the kids first few years were MY memories. H has always worked a lot. Just feeling really sad for my kids. Shouldn't be like this.