Still together but trying to save this

[Denver_2010]

Denver,

1) I ended up sending something a little more generic. I believe it was, 'Things are going very well thanks!'

2) She has not really been initiating contact all that much more. Only when she needs something or wants her things. I haven't really gotten an unsolicited text where she just wanted to say hi, how are you doing. e.g. She will say, 'Hey let me know when I can come get my things. How is everything going?'

3) LRT really won't do me a whole lot of good if she avoids contact with me like the plague.

4) I plan on getting it all together for her this weekend. I am going to probably rent out a storage unit so she can get it at her leisure. It is too much to take in one trip.

5) This is what kills me. There is no chance that he is going to be out of the picture. She defends him over everyone. You would think they were already married. I wish she would have defended me like that.

6) Nothing has been filed yet. I am getting to the point where I think I need to start getting that together. I need to protect myself. The sad truth is that if I served her papers she would most likely sign them quickly.

1) Your response was good. Again, I think that you need to be in LRT. Continue to let her initiate contact. Respond politely with short, to the point, answers. Don't open the door for her to reply back by asking questions of her. To me that is letting her know that she has the continuing option of conversing with you. Let her wonder about that. If she wonders enough, she will continue to initiate contact. At some point, she may actually begin to worry that she losing that option.

2) Hmmm... seems to me that she has asked inquisitive questions. She is not being cold towards you. At this stage, you can't ask for too much more than that.

3) You have to give LRT time to work. It may not. But you have not given it any time at all. I'm talking 3-6 months before you even assess.

4) Good plan.

5) There is ALWAYS a chance. She will see his warts eventually. Fact is, that MOST affairs do not last. The statistics on relationships beginning at the end of a M being successful are not good. The question that you have to ask yourself is if you want to be there if that happens.

6) Not if you answer 'yes' to the question directly above. Why do anything at all right now? I don't see the point unless there is some legal issue in your state that would cause you to be hurt financially if you don't file sooner rather than later. You certainly are in no position emotionally to date or start another R. So why the rush?