As it turns out we've both had to be very flexible because stuff comes up ALL the time it seems like. Meet-the-teacher, football games (D15 is in drill), volunteer events, scout meetings & day campouts (S9), etc. etc. We're constantly coordinating events and working out who has which kid for what hours on which day. Seems almost like we're married or something
Yeah we been quite set on being flexible too, and I hope we can maintain that. So far so good, yet I still feel she has a need to be in control one notch more then me all the time. As long as I can maintain my R with S she can feel like the king of the world for my sake
Originally Posted By: AnotherStander
Ask yourself if you're telling her something she already knows. If you're not sure that she knows that, then go ahead and say it. If she does already know then there's no reason to repeat yourself. Keep in mind that if you keep reminding the WAW that you're waiting for her, she'll see you as plan B- the fallback position. At some point she has to think she might lose you before she'll consider moving you to plan A. That's what detaching and being a bit mysterious does, it makes the WAS wonder if the LBS is moving on without them.
I'm not really sure were I stand here. The day she dropped the bomb I spilled my guts about how I wanted to save this and give myself to her. But I already went 180/LRT after a couple of days and then I found this site and continued with this approach. So yeah, I've told her, but the thing is she might think it was a desperate reach out. After all I've been "detached" since day two so she might feel that I just didn't bother to try anymore after day 1. I think I'm leaning on holding off on saying anything for the time being.
Originally Posted By: AnotherStander
Great, that all sounds like good DB'ing. I wouldn't push trying to get her to go out on a date. Keep doing what you're doing. You'll know when she's ready for a date.
Thanks! When I get confused I try to remember what my original plan was and try to remind myself that it's my feelings taking over. Not always easy though.
Together for 8,5 years. S2 Interest in OM. She left 29.09.12 b/c we couldn't work things out. No signs of OM, not digging. Living in seperate homes, sharing custody.
