oh k_g, I don't know what to say....this is hard to hear.
I feel for you so much. What you are going through with respect to your little ones is just too much.
It is beyond awful. And yet... I can hear his justifications. WASs who can do what they've done would have no problem at all in introducing the OP to their kids. It all fits their wacko plan. Morals and values out the window; it's all about them.
You're right to chastise yourself about having expectations (i.e. you know you can't afford to think normally in any way at all about what he is doing).
I'm in awe of your self-control. And you are so switched on about the pointlessness of approaching him in anger.
In my eyes you're showing an almost saintly forebearance.
I know it doesn't make it hurt any less but you are truly taking the high road here. Not sure I could do it. The sort of stuff that you're dealing with is huge - and you are getting through it with insight, dignity and grace.
A dose of Pema might help, too, if you haven't gone there already.
