Wishing, Not only does he think te kids will be right where he left them, but is also thinks you will be too. In fact, in a year or so, he may not even remember their correct ages. I've seen that happen several times here on this board. They tend to forget that their children are growing up and will have opinions of their own and may state what is on their minds.
All he is thinking about is escape and having the time of his life and doing what he thinks he' missed out before time runs out for him. He's not thinking about what may happen with respect to resentment and anger from you or his children at this time.
Wishing, he may have been a wonderful, caring father pre-crisis, but that man is turned into a pod person because of his crisis. Hopefully he makes it through the entire crisis and comes out the other side a more mature, loving and understanding human being.
I do believe that we all wear rose colored glasses to some extent. We had good marriages and in some cases turned a blind eye to some behaviors because we loved them. Now, those behaviors are gone full throttle which creates confusion and questioning within ourselves. Don't ever doubt that you had a good marriage, you shared many wonderful memories w/him including the birth of your children.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
