I kind of like the way you guys are describing this about scratching an itch and having a calmer and better acting partner.
DB talks about real giving, or in other words loving your partner the way they want to be loved. So right, I'm very clear about wanting sex daily and I will be calmer, not stressed, not grumpy, and will love my partner the way they want to be loved. So it's just like that itchy elbow, doesn't have to take a long time but doing it daily keeps everything peaceful.
I guess b/c sex is always such a hot topic and taboo in our culture and media it's become a "different beast" in their minds. What I'm dealing with is that she keeps telling me that sex is so different than everything else.
On the flip side, it could be argued that if the more highly sexed partner loves their partner the way they want and stop demanding sex then they're more likely to get it...b/c now you're scratching your partners itchy elbow and they're going to be calmer and more likely to scratch your itch.
I'm having a hard time understanding how people ( friends and family ) could support a view where a marital partner witholds sex and intimacy from their partner for a prolonged period of time...