Yes, looks like you're right about him/them viewing the grass as greener on the other side. He's certainly not on the other side of my bed right now! It is what it is, I guess.
He came home pretty drunk last night, not staggering around but I could tell by looking at him. In my mind I just say he's going through a phase, he's going through a phase, don't react because this isn't who he really is. I'm trying to let go of the results and slowly take the focus off of him and keep it on me. Slowly, though, it's not overnight! When I'm not in major pain mode, I try and think of this as an adventure. No matter what happens, it can be an adventure. If he clears his head at some point and I'm still DBing and changing and he STILL doesn't want to be back with me, I have alternatives. At this time I don't have kids so I can join a commune if I want to, or move out of the country for a while. This is drastic thinking I know, but it does make me feel better and empowered in a strange way.
I went out for a while last night and met a cool girl at my group so we're going to get together next week. I've also been speaking to a couple of close friends and one or two family members I feel good talking about this to. I'm very fortunate to have people in my life who love and support me and can help me put it all in perspective.
