Do husbands actually do these things? Do they give "sweet notes" and hugs? Do they wash their wives' cars and do laundry? To me the questions were like some fairy tale scenario.
YES they do.
Of course their LL might not be AOS.
What is your husbands LL, I gather it is not AOS.
I did those things. But when your spouse is in MLC it does not help.
The book is a great resource for a normal marriage. And can help you learn about how your husband is speaking to you. Maybe without any talk!