The crack in my perfect life...

[2chiquitos]

Hi Sweetbriar,

I was aware of the affair before D1 was born and was adamant about me choosing the name and not allowing him to be present during the birth. I was hurt (still am!) and didn't want him involved.

I decided otherwise at the last minute. I thought about our daughter. Growing up my dad wasn't in the delivery room. He was from a different time so his story of my birth was hours after.

I thought about S4s birth and how involved H was and how D1 would feel knowing this. I read that when the parent leaves a child at such a young age they grow up wondering if they were unwanted by that parent. It's not until they are adults that they are able to move on from this.

I don't want my daughter to feel less love from her father in any way. That is if I can do something about it.

So H was present as her birth and I chose the name he had picked out. I can't give my daughter a live in dad but I was able to do this for her, at least.