i don't know guys - my compassion for this man is on "hold". i am not so sure in my case he is feeling anything other than _"woo hoo- i'm "having it all" and that jerk is still hanging on" "whatta fun-boy am i?""" this man- that has said I "think there is more to him than i see- but really there's less" - may have been telling the truth. i heard that- i didn't know he wsa actually commenting on his mental and emotional capabilities- but you know- i think about it now and i'm thinking he was just being honest. too much of a stinkin "chicken" to say- listen up- this is serious and i need to talk to you (which would have meant ttreating me like an (God forbid) equal or something-
BUT- i'm thinking tonite (without anger- rancour or anything else) that maybe he was being honest. maybe there isn't much there - underneath - and perhaps he is perfectly happy. i hear you gys all so sure that your spouse is feeling "pain". i'm not ratty- i'm just not convinced.
i think he actually thinks he is a young man again- doing whatever he feels like doing- having it all - me, the rock (if you will) and everything and everyone else. just my gut.
i do not ever see any pain or remorse or quandry. oblivion is more like it. sorry to report- i am a compassionate guy- i am a guy that can hear if someone is telling me something heartfelt- i'm not feeling it. i'm looking and would LOVE to believe there's more to this than just be being a giant pos and expendible - but maybe not.
sorry to be discouraging here- i just don't know. you know?
someone needs to shoot this horse -
you guys know the pitiful part of this all? i keep thinking that deep inside the only reason someone would db is their conviction that the other person is worthwhile and worthy of the pain they're being dealt. SO the KEY THING IS to detach- but if you did (totally) you'd walk and not be here participating. know what i mean? doing it at all - does not indicate total detachment. if you were- you wouldn't be.
oh well- just saw a tv news item about a guy that was a disabled veteran. i feel ashamed to let my little troubles get me so down sometimes- i'm good comparitively speaking. me- bucking up.
