Keep breathing...

[mamabird]

Not in the same BR and I know he's not losing the weight for me, which annoys me. He's doing it for him, which is good.

This morning I gave him a little wake up back rub and he said Thank you for the first time. Nice to have the recognition at least.

A woman at school who I know he's been confiding in came up to me today and started telling me about some online seminar she's doing about personal change. I was so uncomfortable talking to her because I know whatever I say could go right back to H. However, he did sit next to me in parent meeting today, for all to see.

I'm encouraged by the progress we've made but at the same time feeling impatient. He's got all the benefits of having a wife right now. I cook his meals, wash his clothes and give him love and attention every night. I ask him how work is going. I listen to him. I'm doing all the "wifely" things. He is talking to me more about his friends and things going on in his life. But I'm not getting very much in return at this point. He's certainly not affectionate nor has he shown much interest in anything I am doing. He's very supportive of the kids but he hasn't been much of a husband. So I'm starting to wonder if he is cake eating...

Hopeful, to answer your question, we haven't really discussed MC of late. I don't know if he still wants to go, and if he did, I don't know what the motivation would be. When he brought it up before, and I countered with the mention of Retrouvaille, he totally didn't want to do that because it was "for people who wanted to save their marriages." If I bring it up, is that pressuring him? I don't think it's time yet to ask him where we stand.

So unfortunately today I'm feeling somewhat downtrodden, but I know I must stay the course and quietly carry on...