What should I do? Which technique to use?

[jzoom]

Alright, you guys are right, first I have to be sure I want to save this R or not.

Past couple of days has been more of the same. Sun night I pushed the issue and when she "poured her heart" (as she put it) to me I went cold and silent on her. When I was silent for awhile she said, "you do know I care about you?" I didn't say anything and then she said, "why else would I still be sitting here?" My response was, "I also know you have nowhere else to go."

That coldness went on and when she went to bed I snooped and confronted her with stuff. Of course she got defensive when I confronted her and I still think she's hiding something. She eventually asked why should she keep trying and I told her maybe she shouldn't, maybe she doesn't need me in her life. She said that she never said she didn't need me and I told her that I was saying, that maybe I will never be the man for her. She said that wasn't fair of me. So Sun ended with her feeling even more hurt by me.

Mon I send a long text pouring my heart out and tell her I'm texting it b/c when I try to talk to her in person I'm always interrupted. Later on I tell her what we could do for today to get her to the city to get some documents she needs for food stamps and medical cards. She tells me that the babies father offered a ride. I just say ok but she keeps pushing and I let her know I don't like it; I trust her but don't trust him b/c I know he still wants in her pants. I'm not running through all the details here, just a few things from each day, like I said, just more of the same.

This morning she wakes me up and tells me that I shouldn't be worried about the ride with the babies father. She had told me that if she wanted him she would be with him. I tell her that is why I just said ok until she kept pushing for more. I say that she wants me to act differently...and she cuts me off and says, "I want the happy jzoom from months ago, not the controlled jzoom." She also told me point blank that she doesn't see us as together.

So yeah, still confused b/c she gets offended at the idea of me not being in her life but we aren't "together". She wants the old happy me but when I act that way I get accused of acting like nothing happened and everything is just back to normal.

I'm making a decision now that I want to save the R. I don't want to play some alpha games or anything like that. I want to do what I can to make things right, to get myself back to where I should be, and if she comes back to me great. Guess I need to read DR once again and read through the rules and develop a plan of attack and stick with it.