Rough and Denver: Thanks to you both for the words. Its exactly what I needed...and honestly its exactly what I knew to be true. Im going to stay the course, im going to continue to smile and love her through it. I battle very hard between not pursuing and coming off as 'cold'. Im working very hard at simply being cordial, it seems its another trait of mine that needs some work...im either in or out, I really need to find some medium ground.
Its interesting because in the last 24 hours she's been....'nicer' for lack of a better word...more texts than are necessary it seems. They are still mostly logistic type texts, but she seems to be asking more questions than normal. She even called last night to 'explain' why she wasn't home by the time practice ended...mind you I didnt care why she wasn't home and she didnt owe me any explanation, but I didnt say that to her either I just told her it was no big deal and moved forward.
And Im trying to recognize why my anxiety is higher now than it has been becuase honestly shouldnt it get a little easier as things move forward? So here are the logical reasons I have more anxiety than normal now....
#1 The holidays are coming up.
#2 We're closing in on the 6 month point and that was her original cut-off for lack of a better word, truly this means nothing so I shouldnt worry about it.
#3 Our anniversary is in 2 weeks....I have purchased her a gift...still unsure about what im going to do about the anniversary. I plan to give her the gift but I don't plan to make a big deal of it at all, my plan for now is to not actually give it to her in person i'll more likely just leave it in the garage or something and at least for now I don't plan to do a card or anything 'personal' like that. I had considered sending flowers to her office b/c I always have, but if I do that it will be with no name attached or card either.
#4 This could sound funny but its really been unsettling to me, my business partner and I are looking at buying a couple of apartment complexes. There are two reasons this gives me more anxiety than usual, obviously the first one is that its a large investment and those are always a little nerve wracking. The 2nd part is that my wife has complained in the past about being the last person to know about things like this. One of the reasons she's the last to know is because we communicated poorly, but another big reason is that alot of the deals we make never go beyond the planning/running the numbers stage and I really never sensed that she wanted to hear about each and every opportunity that we looked at and considered. (Professionally we're in very different worlds...she's an RN and im an accountant.) The thing is this one may move and move rather quickly if it does so i've got to be ready....anyway, enough about that deal...the point is im not sure whether I should try to sit down and talk to her about it or just not worry about running it by her. If we were even 'talking' regular I would definitely talk to her about it b/c i've come to realize that she doesn't like not knowing whats going on, but we don't really chat so im not sure what to do wit this one.
