Looking for the silver lining...

[forward]

IB,
You have not been D'ed very long. Give yourself some time to get used to the new IB and to your situation. You're not long working on things, either. It gets easier, but it takes some time.

Perhaps some other ways to look at things: You lost some naivete. You are stronger now. You are independent and free to do as you wish.

I remember that at some point, I realized I'd lost my sense of humor. Then it started to come back. You will start to find all kinds of ways that you're different from X, and that you like yourself better w/o him.

The empty nest is something that perhaps you are grieving as well. But...maybe now it's time to find who you are apart from X and family. You may find that you like the new IB better in the long run.

I think it's helpful to read self-help books, think about what happened, and think about how you want life to be better. I think it's natural to have pain and regret, but I also feel that those feelings pass over time and after a while the regret is a twinge here and there as opposed to being overwhelming, where you feel so very rejected.

Who do you want the new IB to be like?