Speaking of forgiveness, is that something that is offered? Does it need to be asked for? Or is it something that is done internally without verbally expressing?
I believe true forgiveness is for our own sake, not the for the other person. Forgiveness is not based on whether or it is asked, nor is it based on whether or not it is deserved. Forgiveness is not even a "feeling". You decide you will forgive another (or yourself) and it is done from your own free will. It's good when the feelings catch up to the decision, but sometimes it takes a while. Some people experience an immediate sense of inner peace, while others have to remind themselves that they have chosen to forgive in spite of the emotions they have at the moment.
I hope for your sake that you will forgive her.....and you can, you know. Once you forgive her, then I believe you will begin to rebuild a new life. But expect to continue to face times that you still experience anger and frustration at the situation. It wasn't what you wanted, and forgiveness doesn't make the problems go away. However, forgiveness is the beginning of healing for you.
I hope you continue to stay with us.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
