I'm sorry you're here but it sounds like you are ready and willing to learn and grow from this. The best thing you can do is to do your best to NOT be around if all that's going to happen is sitting around and staring at each other. Now is the time to develop new hobbies, learn about geocaching, start an exercise routine, join a club etc. It sounds like your H is content to sit around and revel in his misery. He's welcome to do that. YOU need to be better than that. This is where the "focusing on yourself" comes in. All your questions are focused on what you need to do in relation to your H. And while I realize you still need to talk, you've already been given great advice. Keep it simple. Answer questions when asked, but answer vaguely. THEN go off and do your own thing. It seems counter-intuitive to NOT be around when you're hoping to fix a relationship. But you can't fix anything until H is ready. He will tell you when that is. Until then, do NOT discuss it and LIVE!
If you want some insight into the mind of an MLCer, feel free to go back on some of my threads. My H's journey is still ongoing but he's definitely out of the fog and has made a lot of statements that completely back up the advice you'll get on these boards. It's a hard road and there are no guarantees other than the fact that if you work on yourself, you'll end up a better person in the end.
"Love me when I least deserve it, for that is when I need it the most"
M18 Me39,H42 D16 Bomb 1/10 Moved out 3/10 OW 6/10 H wants to R,OW gone 11/10 H moves back 5/11 H wants to wear rings again 9/11
