Tori you are right of course. I acted really stupid today. I sort of don't care. Really. I care about protecting myself and my kids. If nothing else, once I go to an attorney I can file a separation agreement and establish boundaries that so far he has ignored. I will go as soon as I can get in. If it is next week then so be it. If they can do it tomorrow that is good too. I really do not want anything to do with him at this point. I have made other arrangements for the kids and will not deviate and give in to him any longer. I do need to calm down. Frankly, not sure if I will. I have never been so angry. At least I am not a weak weeping mess. That's something at least. Thank you for your support and good advice. I truly do believe in DB in most cases. I just feel in my own there is nothing left. I know what the research says about divorce and children but I also know it cannot be any better for them to have such a terrible example of what being married is like. I do not want my kids to think this is normal or model the behavior they have seen.
