AS, Thank you for this detailed response. it's helped me a great deal to hear what you think of stbx's actions.
He is so resolute the he is doing the right thing that sometimes I start to doubt myself.
He seems to have developed a real problem with anyone who will not do exactly as he says. He makes up his mind about how things should be, and that is that. Everyone has to fall in line.
This is what he demonises me for ("You won't listen to me"), so I am afraid that he might turn on the kids now that they are showing their resistance, too.
When he picked them up from school on Fri afternoon, he tried again to take them to a cafe. They refused again. Apparently he got very angry at them after arguing that they should come with him. He ended up dropping them in the driveway of our home and refusing to come in (as is his normal practice). Just stormed off.
No contact from him on Saturday, but then at 9pm, both kids get a text that says: "Love you. Miss you".
We were sitting watching TV. They each just said to me: "Daddy texted me and said ..." and threw down their phones. They did not reply. And for once, I didn't try to persuade them to.
So sorry to hear that you went through such pain as a teen.
I try to imagine how it must hurt to have this happen as a child, but it's hard to know - especially when they keep saying they are fine.
