My problem is that D16 has steadfastly refused counselling over the last 8 months or so. To the point of getting semi-hysterical every time i mention the possibility.
Looking back, I think both kids twigged early on that stbx was involved with our former family friend (OW).
Unfortunately, OW is a relationship/child counsellor herself.
She got into the field because of her very twisted relationship with her own father, who D-ed her mother when OW was in her teens. Her father is a prominent medico around our town who is notorious for being a philanderer - typically stringing along several women at one time - all of whom believe they are his 'partner'.
OW, in her 30s and now D-ed herself and with no children, still takes all her vacations with her father - they travel overseas together around 2-3 times a year (very weird). She is 'daddy's girl'.
Just before bomb drop, OW took out a full-page ad in D16's school year-book, advertising her services as a child counsellor. It was particularly bad that D16's design was chosen as the cover of the yearbook and she was awarded a prize for it. OW's ad sits prominently on the first page of 'D16's' book.
I don't believe this ad was placed accidentally. OW has been driving stbx's exit from our marriage over several of the last years and has tried, indirectly, to reveal her relationship with my H at every step of the way.
I think D16's aversion to counsellors stems from her feeling that her own father's abandonment is linked to this woman. She has no trust in them at all.
Sometimes i can't believe the weirdness and complexity of my own sitch. This is all just too much to be true.
