Hi Lisa.7. Perhaps posting in the forum what your situation is would help?
Take a look for some posts by Cadet. He has a lot of reading that past folks have written that are worth reading.
As for them being "different" - a lot of that has to do with the process. This is a MLC forum, but essentially the person you "thought" you knew, is no longer that person. They do things 180 degrees differently now. Think differently. Smell differently. Act differently. They are, in essence not the same person we "knew".
Some of it is also that we detach and view them differently of course.
So all in all, it is a combination of things that lead to that.
Psychologists reason that a person wears a "mask" or many masks during their lifetime. That's part of their perceived identity. For instance, when somebody wants to impress you, they act differently and "wear a mask" acting like somebody they think you want to see. It goes deeper though. That person wears a "mask" to themselves as well. At some point in their development, they remove the "mask" and show who they truly are.
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
