Kicking a$$ and taking names!

[reachingHigher]

Snodderly, don't be sorry. Be blunt. I need that. Yes! I was starting to melt.

I think sometimes my H is just friendly b/c he dreads a nasty D. He wants to remain friends. And I often interpret it as love and care. One of my GF's said to think of it as "business friendly". "you can manage that", she says.

If I really listen to what H is saying (sifting through as you say) I hear he still wants a D and wants to pay as little as possible AND wants to flirt openly with other women (FB with our 55 mutual friends and family watching) AND wants me to stay under his thumb also! Repulsive, isn't it?

I have some time this morning to do the work you suggested. I wrote a temporary budget and gave to H a couple of weeks ago so he could see what I actually have to pay for. I have credit card statements to show actual expenses (I never use cash and try to hide like he does).

I'll do the work and it'll make me feel so much better and stronger this week. I know if he changes his mind, reversing all this is easy. But I need to press forward knowing that the quality of my future life depends on decisions I make now. I CAN do it.

Yes, I agree with him knowing me so well and sucking me into this communication thing.

A friend of me was asking me yesterday about what hobbies I had and I felt stumped. There were lot of things I USED to like to do but my heart has been gone out of my life for a while. It's sickening to think how much time/energy we obsess about our spouse.

Thanks, Snodderly, for the good kick in the a$$ this morning! Lol!