WAW in Los Angeles

[keep_going]

WLA,

I spend some time yesterday reading your whole thread and I wanted to say that I am so sorry for what you have gone through. Your situation has really touched me. You have had quite a ride plus you have had to deal with both your and your mom's health issues on top of it.

I have to say that your wife's attitude and behavior throughout this whole ordeal is, in my humble opinion, one of the most insensitive I have read of on these boards. From what you describe, I have to think that she is in a lot of pain. I can imagine that a lot of it might come from problems in your M, but that a lot of it also comes from personal, unresolved issues. I think she probably has a lot to deal with on her own and she is not in a position to do so, given her actions. She must also be extremely depressed. I have to feel bad for her because that is the only way I can explain her acting as cold as she has towards you in all of this.

It seems to me like you have been able to see your role in the demise of your M and I congratulate you for remaining calm and acting in such a controlled fashion since she left and specially given her behavior.

All I can say is that I am sorry you have gone through all of that. My H has also done some very insensitive things since he left. I don't mean to bash our spouses here. I believe in my heart that they truly don't mean to hurt us so much, but the bottom line is that they do. My point is just that this pain that a WAS unwittingly inflicts can be so great, that only those who have experienced something like this can understand it. And so I feel for you.

Please take care of your health and keep up the good work and the focus on yourself. As you know, good PMA goes a long way and greatly affects our physical health as well and from what I have read, you have been so strong throughout and I hope you continue doing so.

Best wishes for you.