The letter accompanying the waiver indicated the fee the administrator will charge. Of course there is also penalties and taxes if the split is realized as income. I am not an L. This is my rudimentary understanding from my sitch.
In my sitch additional funds are being held in trust by her attorney to pay for the penalties and additional taxes. That is what delayed all of this when X decided to change how she receives the split. Increasing the amount she realizes as income increased the amount she must pay and the documents needed to account for that as I should not be liable for her decision to change the distribution from what the court ordered.
5K is not out of the realm of possibility if taxes and penalties are factored in. It actually seems low. Of course that is dependant on the amount split.
BITS Me 55, ACK, when did that happen? Doesn't feel like 55 D 30 S 27
You create your own universe as you go along - Winston Churchill
I would think 5k would only be if you didn't roll it over but took the money out and paid taxes on it.
I had a somewhat complicated QDRO (Ex had a defined benefit plan, but would still be earning more benefits after the divorce, formulas had to be applied and it all had to be kosher within the somewhat arcane rules of the large organization he worked for). I hired an outside expert to do the QDRO, to make sure I didn't get messed over, but it still only cost several hundred dollars (and I thought that was cheap given the amount of work involved).
Now - I suppose if you had several DIFFERENT plans to QDRO, it could be more (my friend who referred me to this guy, when she got divorced, her husband had several different pension plans from several different jobs, so I think her cost to QDRO all 4 or 5 of them was more like atill, it's worth it to make sure it's done right.
That is what drives it. X needs funds to pay her half of our debt. When she could not get a loan to accomplish this she changed the QDRO to get the funds from the distribution, then changed it again taking the entire distribution as available funds.
If I thought the doomsayer’s interpretation of the Mayan long count calendar was correct I’d have joined her and had a December to remember
BITS Me 55, ACK, when did that happen? Doesn't feel like 55 D 30 S 27
You create your own universe as you go along - Winston Churchill
Boring post, boring is good, boring is peaceful, boring prepares us for the next round of DRAMA
Got back from bow hunting very, very early Monday morning, zero dark thirty. We were watching the weather forecasts and cut the trip short. The prediction for where we were was at least a foot of snow. This put us at risk of becoming stranded for a couple of days. I would have liked another couple of days in the woods, but not if we were attempting to get out.
It was a productive trip materially and spiritually. It was a risk, but I left my cell at camp while I was in stand.
Cerberus nearly knocked me over when he saw me enter the house and stayed in physical contact for most of the next day. Fortunately he respects the boundary about my bedroom. We hunkered down for the next couple of days while Sandy blew herself out, nothing as severe as the east coast, although I was glad for the pantry and generator.
Kept an eye on mom and checked in with SIL1 after we lost power. There are a couple of downed trees to reduce to firewood and I have to clean gutters again this weekend.
Work was closed for a day and a half. We put a skeleton crew in place yesterday afternoon to provide customer support and today after the power was restored we’ve been working to bring back phone and internet support. We’re digging out.
Son and DIL brought my granddaughter by last night for a short visit. She was dressed as Tigger. It was a short visit as the she had missed a nap and needed some quiet time.
BITS Me 55, ACK, when did that happen? Doesn't feel like 55 D 30 S 27
You create your own universe as you go along - Winston Churchill
Hey JB, thanks for checking in. How is the king of GAL?
It only becomes drama if we let it. I’ve been letting it a lot less these days. X sent me an email the other day, the first one in months. In it she explained she needed her old recipe box, the recipe box containing her grandmother’s recipes. She explained she needed a specific recipe for Finnish Tarts before this Friday (today).
She hasn’t made Finnish Tarts in 20 years and I always thought they were a waste of left over pot roast, but I digress.
So I thought about it for a while and located her old recipe box. I should probably clean out the kitchen cupboards. Doing so hasn’t been high on my priority list. I looked through the box and I did not locate the specific recipe she “needed”. I briefly considered chucking the whole thing in the trash, but decided to take the high road and determine a means of getting it to her with the least impact to me. In her email she had suggested meeting in a local park or giving it to our S and DIL.
Giving it to S and DIL was out of the question. X recently angered them again and I didn’t wish to give them my bag o trash to handle. Fortunately, our D stopped by for a visit and upon seeing the recipe box out asked why it was there and what I was doing with it.
After I explained she said her mother shouldn’t be attempting to saddle me with more drama. That her mother should have either taken the box when she took her “stuff” or have written it off as lost. Our D has been all about erasing evidence of X’s presence from my house. I didn’t think I was upset by X’s request. I thought I was bemused.
In the end our D decided to take the box with her and give it to her mother. She said it had been sometime since she had seen her and she owed her an email.
I suspect this was an opening gambit from X to feel me out about going though the house again for more of her stuff. I am not wasting energy on this beyond recording it here.
The QDRO finally went through so we are coming to the final act of this drama X put into motion. I have roughly 60 days to refi the house and get her to sign a quit claim on it. After that there is the last tax filing before I am finally free of the financial entanglements.
I have been lurking over on the MLC forum, I have few illusions this will be completely over soon. With each passing milestone X’s ability to suck me into her drama lessens and that is a good thing.
BITS Me 55, ACK, when did that happen? Doesn't feel like 55 D 30 S 27
You create your own universe as you go along - Winston Churchill
