holy crow heather- you just described my feelings EXACTLY. IT'S PItiful isn't it?
it's the darn memory(ies) of what it feels like to be valued & "special" that make it soooooo unimaginable to spend the rest of eternity feeling sooooooo "NOT", now.
what the heck is a girl to do - feel - think - ??????? it's sad and scary (and weirdly comforting) to hear someone describe 3exactly what is in my heart-gut - dawnmarie too- i push back my chair and don't know whether to laugh or cry-
oh man- do you guys think that in a lifetime every person goes thru something this awful and gut wrenching- of some variety - ???
my girlfriend told me a story yesterday about her neice's boyfriend (a troubled & jealous man) shooting himself in the head six inches from her face after saying "look what you've brought me to do" - bam. i keep thinking about this mentally disturbed man doing it- and my horror and thinking how fortunate for her that he merely wanted to kill himself - and not her. it's soooowierd i can't believe it's something in the life of a person i know - and feels kind of close to home.
got me wondering about the "personal tragedies" of people.
