Sam, As others have pointed out, the mlcer wants and craves control over everything and every body, and yet, they really have no control over themselves or their emotions. During mlc, depression hits them hard and their emotions are what drives them as well. This is an "emotional" journey for them and when they are this way, you can't reason w/them. That's why we advise everyone to step back and allow them blow in the wind. If you do this, they can only fight w/themselves until their fire has burned out.
Sure she's nice and wants to support you, blah, blah, blah. This is all fine and good, but her guilt is eating her up and yes, she wants to look good in the eyes of others. They do not like to look like the bad person to others. Like a moth, when they get too close to the flame, they will flit away. When she allows herself to feel too comfortable and the loving feeling returns just a bit, that is when she backs off and says the things she does about loving someone else.
This is difficult, but you can't take what she says personally. She's lashing out at you because she thinks you are the reason she is so unhappy...it's not. She is very confused and you can't allow her to control you, your emotions or your actions. Learn to detach more and go on w/your life. She needs time and space to grow up.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
