I have to comment I really think you've done a great job assessing where you are now. Especially as it pertains to the OW, I think you nailed it as to what they offer. Can it continue? The monotany of everyday life should wedge its way in, and likely if it was based on fun, it won't be fun much longer.
I also agree with the holding onto the pain and anger, and how the WAS thinks they are getting rid of it. Forgiveness by the WAS is a major factor. I can't think of anyway to accelerate this forgiveness other than being friendly and kind.
As for option 1 above, I've noticed and been trying to pay attention to some of the success stories and most of them have been with the LBS having some contact and being kind and gentle. I have yet to see a success story come from pitch black, unless I'm missing somthing. Although Kevinlost hasn't really told us how his stuff came back around?
Not to say you should inititate any other contact, but if you are prepared to move forward with that, the acting as if would be that you've accepted it and are moving on with your life. Ultimately it won't be acting as if, it will just be. Just thoughts. Are you prepared for that decision whatever the outcome? Really tough.
