She built the wall. She built it to guard her emotions. She has checked out of the relationship. Don't push any physical contact on her, it will likely just make her mad or upset. You need to keep up the detachment for yourself and to give her time and space to consider her thoughts and emotions.
Yep, I've pretty muched lived up to that part. We've given each other a gentle pat on the back, but other than that I haven't initiated physical contact.
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You're not out of the woods yet. I was in pretty good shape until about a month after BD, that's when I really plummeted and hit rock bottom. It came as a total surprise because I thought I was handling things just fine and OK with it regardless of the outcome.
Again and again she gives me signs and confirmation that we are through. Each time I think I'll break down, but I don't. I'm sad, but coping. Still, like you said, I'm dreading what emotions may come.
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They'll do the emotional separation one step at a time. One week they'll quit wearing the rings, next week they'll change their FB profile, next week they'll take photos down, etc.
Sure enough, today while packing my things she asked what to do about facebook status and family who might not know yet. We agreed to clear R status today, but nothing happened. I stayed calm and easy going while discussing with her, even trying to lighten the mood. I could tell she was sad, but she switches to unaffected mode pretty quick.
For the moment being I think I've lost hope of anything happening any time soon, if even ever. For my own sake I need to keep working on letting go and living my life. Being a good dad gives strength and joy, and there are plenty of activities out there.
Together for 8,5 years. S2 Interest in OM. She left 29.09.12 b/c we couldn't work things out. No signs of OM, not digging. Living in seperate homes, sharing custody.
