Finally heard from H by text the day after my b'day. He said he had been busy helping around the house since his mother had been ill. Anyway, we talked on the phone that night. The conversation didn't go well. He was being really short with me, so I ended the call. I immediately got an apology text. He said MIL really wasn't well and he was scared. I just said I understood and was here if he wanted to talk - which he still isn't doing with anyone.
MIL had a dr appt today to see what was causing her symptoms and if they found anything, then they were going to admit her right then. I talked to MIL on Sunday as well and I could tell something was off. I prayed about it and decided to come see her for myself. I didn't tell H I was coming. I just wanted to be here in case she did need surgery. Something in my spirit was just saying go.
I didn't involved myself in the dr appt. In fact, I didn't tell H I was here until after he gave me the rundown on the test results. There was a slight pause (of surprise I'm sure), then he said Thank you, and that he appreciated me coming. MIL ended up not being able to be released until 5pm so I told himself I'd just come by the house to see her once they got her settled.
I'm sure I'll get some 2x4s for this, but I prayed about it, and believe I was supposed to come. I'm not going to talk to H about us. I just want to see MIL, and then I'm heading back home tomorrow.
On another note, I have to be honest and say I've pretty much given up on any hope of a R. But I swear everyone I've talked to today (family & friends) have told me not to give up yet. It seems to be the going theme for every conversation. I will say that each conversation has given me some things to think about. So that's what I'm going to do. Spend some time thinking and praying. I've slacked off since H left. That's what kept me grounded after BD, so obviously that's what I need to get back to.
