my SBTXW (legally separated Jan 2012) has been getting in touch more often. She feels very alone, that much is obvious. She is looking to the future and trying to figure out what to do. She seems to want to connect with me more and more, and tells me she likes talking to me. I am trying to remain steady, not intiating contact most times, letting her drive things. Just being here for her.
I say quit the going dim/ dark stuff and try to get the ball rolling again if you're still interested in her. If you don't want to be in limbo then don't continue what you're doing! Call her, invite her on a date. If she's not interested then maybe it would be best for you to break all contact with her instead of being stuck in the friend zone.
