Rough, I know we're not supposed to mind read in these situations, but I'm gonna pull out my crystal ball for your sitch for just a minute here...
I think there could be a good reason she's putting all this stuff off: She's nervous as HE!! about this conversation. It's probably even more nerve-wracking for her than it is for you... I mean she has NO idea how you're going to react, and your darkness probably has her mind racing a million miles a minute as to where you stand with the sitch.
Okay, mind reading over.
Stay the course Rough. I wouldn't PUSH for this conversation right now, as it seems she's putting it off for whatever reasons... And as you can remember from my sitch, I decided that I NEEDED to have the convo in person... But our sitchs are different in that my W lives hundreds of miles away, and I saw this as one of my ONLY opportunities to be in the same room with her, to show her my convictions, and to give her an opportunity to "see" the changes I'm undergoing... I don't know that any of these apply to you right now, so take that with a grain of salt.
Either way, Good luck Rough. You're in our thoughts!
