Husbands personality changed the last a couple of years. Several things have happened... Oldest son graduated college Mother came down with breast cancer Became part owner of a company Chronic issues with business partners Oldest son in boating accident with my husband broke back (he is fine) and in grad school in another state.. Youngest son getting ready to graduate college and move for grad school Turned 50 He has been very quiet around other people but still talked and did stuff with me, for the last two years. 1/12 Big argument and I told him if you are that unhappy the leave...DID NOT MEAN IT AT ALL! Felt backed into a corner and it just came out. 3/12 major issues at work came very upset felt like he was having a mental breakdown. 4/12 under a lot of stress with everything. Tells me he has been chronically nauseated for the past year and no sleep. 5/12 oldest son graduates college no happiness. It made him worse to me. Begged him to seek help. Would not go. Starts hinting that it is not his past or work, but everything is bothering him. He doesn't care about anything or anyone. (ouch) 7/12 oldest moves 20hours away Still pleading with him to go talk to someone. 8/12 after seeing a counselor who allows him to share his feelings, and then asks how does this make you feel.....and that's it.....asks him if we have ever thought about separation... He comes home tells me about it...the tears start...(granted I was leaving to go home for my 50th birthday party with friends) so out of pure emotional response I leave a month earlier. 9/12 counselor tells him he is depressed and the marriage is causing his depression. WOW! He tells me he is unhappy, he loves me but isn't in love with me. After which I made a fool of myself begging, pleading, crying on the phone. 10/12 told him I can't have those type phone calls anymore where I act like that. So we took break from calling. Was in the ER for kidney stones this last week. And he showed concern. When we talk on the phone he is greeted by nothing but positive emotions. I told him I was excited to come home which met with silence tonight. And then he told me he was going to start taking flying lessons. There has been no intimacy because he can't. Because of the stress, depression so the doctor told him. I have listened hard and well with his concerns and issues. I have made many mistakes. Intimacy being the biggest. His emotional disconnect. Which goes hand in hand. I told him I was going to fight for this marriage. I love him. Always have. Just got overly settled thinking that things would get better. Any advice, please...I go home this Sunday, and I am scared.
