Thank you my trio of supporters at this time. 8) I did sleep well, due to shear exhaustion. I still had lots of low mood most of this day, yet have been positively busy at work which has helped distract me as well as give me more time to process everything (including sitting with the pain -- I'm thinking of the neg thoughts on purpose to see what's there, but not too much because I don't want to overly obsess / torture myself). My PMA is better, then again, I'm not home. I believe I have enough to rebuild.
I'll add more later on. I've been working on / I need a POA - Plan of Action --> for me.
NG, I really like Melody. I've been using her Grattitude towards 40 days of a miracle. Uncanny, but enjoyable.
Tori, negative future thoughts in the sense of if we D, she'll have to share the kids, holidays will be tough, if "we" ever make it to the point of working on R, it will be too difficult, fear she'll never be happy enough (with anyone, including herself). Some script? Some truth? Probably a little both.
Arsene, thank you for joining in on my sich. I welcome everyone's input, and I think distance will be needed, more so to protect myself. I doubt I'll do it this week as it's my "w/e" to go out and I don't wanna miss my kiddos too much (at least while I do have them in my home). Probably the following week for at least a few days. We'll see what happens between now and then. It's nice to have a "free" backup / safe place to go.
Again, I'll be posting more / seeking help later on in developing my POA 8)
Thank you all so much. I'd be a lot more lost and devastated without you all.
