The teenager analogy really helps. Your W sounds like my 18-yr-old daughter when I tell her she Can't do something she wants to do. "But, I'm 18, I can do whatever I want....blah,blah,blah..."

My h appears to be about 16 right now--I knew him when he was 16 and I think he was actually more mature back then. At least he was honest about what he was doing! H is Mr. Party-Hearty right now, reliving his glory days, living somewhat like a gypsy, somewhat committed to a party girl and pretends he has NO Responsibilities. Ick.

He just avoids everyone remotely connected to responsibility-COMPLETELY AWOL. I'd still stay away from him right now, even if he wasn't AWOL, because I'm tired of being hurt. The distance hasn't been a bad thing. Coulda done without the OW, but the distance part has been great while he finds himself *in a bottle of whiskey and a bowl of pot.

Sometimes I think distance brings clarity. But, I know separation brings a whole other set of problems.

Went through the tantrums and blaming before he moved out. Fun, Fun, Fun... It was always, "I'm done." Somehow, without realizing it, I had pushed him to the limit and he just couldn't take it anymore. I'm a beast-wife apparently.

Take care of yourself as best you can. When someone is in your face it's so hard to maintain any clear perspective on what's going on.

Heather

"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson