My apologies in advance if I'm beginning to sound like a broken record, especially on Mondays. And at least at this point, I'm strapped in to this roller coaster ride and I can see the loops coming up now!
So all that said, I'm having an awfully rough morning... one of those "Post GAL" kind of days.
The emptiness of my house really got to me again this morning. The absence of W from my life is more pronounced today than I'm comfortable with.
I miss the hell out of her. And while I feel I have been and continue to make progress on myself, it stings that I can't seem to make progress on my sitch.
This "darkness" thing is especially tough today, when I have a damn good reason to be able to reach out to W (as she filed for a tax extension, which is now due, and she almost certainly needs help and info from me).
But I won't be reaching out to her. Even if my heart screams that I need to DO SOMETHING.
I guess I'm just having a down day, which is to be expected once in a while. But damn do I want to hear from W today...
I think what I need more than anything else is for the work day to be over so I can go home and just get in a good old fashioned cry.
Labug: I guess my yardstick at this point is W-initiated contact. I laid it all on the line earlier this month... pouring my heart out and setting my boundaries to try to protect myself... and asking that she not contact me while OM is in the picture.
I understand that patience is so very key here, and I'd be insane to think that after just a little more than a week I'd see some change, much less actually HEAR from W.
I need to keep reminding myself that nothing needs to be done. That I've taken a HUGE step in my life and in the R. And now that the "ball is in her court" I just need to stop thinking about it so much, keep focusing on making and applying the positive changes in my life and truly become a better person.
It's just tougher some days than others. And today is one of those days... Where I can SO CLEARLY see the future I'm shooting for, but it's just so out of reach.
[quote=AlkalineThoughts]Labug: I guess my yardstick at this point is W-initiated contact. I laid it all on the line earlier this month... pouring my heart out and setting my boundaries to try to protect myself... and asking that she not contact me while OM is in the picture.[/quote
So at the risk of starting another firestorm, I'd like to run something by the boards.
I'm sure we all remember the "Work Email Exchange" from last week.
Well this morning, she sent another STRICTLY business email letting me know that she has now completed the task which she referenced in her last email.
That's all. No "Hope you had a good weekend" no "Take Care"... Which is good.
I want to respond, as I want to be receptive of her reaching out, but I don't want to give too much.
I was thinking I'd send a one word or two word response: