So here's my story part 2

[Arsene]

That sounds rough Afa,

I think you know what to do now it's just a matter of doing it mate. First of all, go back to DB and work on your PMA.

IMO, whether you need it or not, you should just go to your parents. Don't tell her where you are, just tell her you need to reflect on things for some time and leave her wondering where and for how long. Tell your kids you're going for a holiday (or some time away) and then go dark for a while.

It'll do you a world of good, and as a bonus, it might actually make her think. From what you said about your convo, there is still love there and she sounds like she doesn't want to give up her family. But for now, she doesn't have to as you guys still live together.

I'm in a bit of a similar situation with W except that she has moved out but she does come around quite a bit. I know that for myself, I need to put a bit of distance between us and not be so available. Each interaction we've had lately has been good, and I'm glad about that but I think she needs to miss me a bit (if that is still possible). This is perhaps also true in your case.

Take care mate.