My old thread was getting a bit long and towards the end I started to lose it. So I thought it better to take stock and rethink and get back to some basics.

My main issues with the M are me not providing enough emotional support, not complimenting W enough to make her feel special and not supporting her enough around the house. There is also a deep buried issue when we tried having another baby a few years back. We have barely spoken about this properly and I feel that both W and me never laid this to rest.

W still set on her own place with S. I don't want her to go and take S.

But things are a lot better with W at moment. We are talking, having the odd joke etc and we are back in the position where things appear normal except the intimacy side.

I have been impatient thinking she will wake up one morning and have a change of heart. Reality is hitting home on this! It is our wedding anniversary tomorrow. I have bought her a card but not sure whether I shld give it to her. It wld be pressure!

180 s r going ok, GALing starting to take shape.

Now managed to source finance for DB coach so will be ringing them 1st thing to sort out.

W main issue appears to be attraction towards me and intimacy. Not enough cuddles etc, and she has pulled right away from any physical touch/contact. Although she has come up with far more in her re writing of history I think her losing the attraction and emotional neglect on my part are the key factors which are related. I now know there is an OM involved who she has beenb going to for emotional support prior to our troubles starting. He was a mutual friend but has recently left his W.

I am not sure how to handle this other than detach. Detachment is still a big issue. I'm still focussing on W actions and my heart jumps everytime she views a property.

I am trying to keep focussed on my main goal which gets me thru the day 2 day. I am struggling with the idea of paying W more attention but at the same time not being pursuing. But I have been making the odd comment such as 'is that a new top, it looks good on u' etc. Trying to let her know I notice how she links without it being over powering.

Lost loads of weight in the last mth and non of my clothes fit smile. Excuse to get a new wardrobe:). Other than that I am enyoying the calm before the next storm.

Just a quick thanks to all who commented on my previous thread and have given me some home truths when I needed them. I wld have given up without ur support.